Thursday, January 29, 2009

My Surrender Date

I was watching Oprah a while back (disclaimer-I take Oprah with a grain of salt) and she had a therapist on helping a couple with some issues. She gave the husband an assignment. She asked him to take his wife on a surrender date. This wife is a typical wife (I could identify with her anyway). She's the household manager/planner/CEO/Controller. She plans meals, trips, outfits, dates, dr appointments, you name it. The husband has settled into this agreement and has long since spoken up to have a say in anything because they have settled into their roles, and that's the wife's role in their household. Anyway, the therapist instructed the husband to plan a surrender date. This would include arranging for the babysitter, deciding where they would go, what they would do, and my favorite part, he would decide what she would wear. The wife had to surrender ALL control on every level to her husband. This sounded like a fabulous idea to me, so I shared my desire for this type of date to my husband and he agreed to it.
I don't think my husband has planned a date for us since we were dating. It's not his fault necessarily...I just sort of took it over and never looked back. I even planned our honeymoon. I've planned every date, every vacation, every overnighter. I guess I'm a control person and I decided it was time to let it go! We were in a date night "rut" and needed to climb out of it!
So last night we had our surrender date. He informed me last week to be ready for our date at 5pm. He did share with me a few days prior that we'd be going to a blazer game. He decided it didn't need to be a surprise, he just needed to cover all details. He rose to the occasion and did such a great job that I'm hoping this will be a regular thing for us! At times I found myself butting in and asking questions and he told me he had it covered, don't worry about it. Giving up complete control was harder than I thought it would be. He arranged for child care (two different sitters were needed since it was Awana before and one after), he picked the restaurant (Standfords at JB), got us AWESOME seats at the blazer game and he helped pick out my outfit the night before. He did such a great job that I told him he gets to plan our 10 year anniversary weekend :) Thanks for a fun date night sweetie!

Our seats were in the 9th row...we've never sat that close, it was a real treat!

I didn't get a full shot of my outfit, but he picked out the jeans and the hat and also helped me pick out the top...he requested that I wear something with the blazer colors!

My only action shot of the night..."LA" had a great game!

I know these guys are tall, but I never realized how tall they were...I think Greg Oden must wear size 18 shoes!

They won the game with double digits....a fun time was had by all!


Meredith said...

Looks like so much fun... even though you were at a sporting event! :P!

Glad you were able to surrender... it feels so good!

Dee said...

Wow! Super fun date!Great job surrendering. Alex and I have always taken turns planning the anniversaries. It's my turn this year.

Eryn said...

Good for you. I think I need to try that (um, dating for starters). :) Thanks for the inspiration!